unironedman

Right. The order of business. Let’s get to it, shall we. Running. Yes. There were five of these events this week, which is bang on schedule, and as any decent coach will tell you, consistency beats just about anything else (except massive talent, of course). But for the rest of us chumps, showing up is where it’s at. And so I did. Five times.

Tuesday was an evening run in the rain, and I dodged some of it by hitting the trails in the woods. In truth, the rain was not much of a bother, and from a wider perspective, not enough to soften the ground, or give hope to the farming community. But still, the weather has reverted back to type here in terms of temperature and cloudiness. It’s just that the rainfall forgot to tag along. For now. The meanderings in the woods is why the 8k took over 50 minutes to complete. But from hard-earned experience and more than one face-plant due to sneaky tree roots, one cannot build any pace in the woodland trails.

I tagged Wednesday’s run as a ‘short tempo 5k’ which is hilarious. Good job I don’t have a coach, or they would have slapped me upside the head. But I suppose (at 5:24 pace) it did fulfil the basic requirements of a tempo run. Cough.

Thursday was another modest 6k or so, back on some of those woody trails by the river at a very modest pace.

I took Friday off, as planned, and resolved to actually DO Kilcock parkrun the next morning, which had been my plan last week, but I had contrived numerous reasons not to do so. That’s always a tell-tale sign; multiple reasons not to do a thing. Not one decent excuse; just death by tiny cuts from many small excuses. Man up, for goodness sake, and make a decision!

So I rose in plenty of time on Saturday, and the sun was out, and the wind was down, which certainly ticked several boxes. Kilcock parkrun is all along the Royal Canal, and is quite exposed to the elements. It’s an out and back, so what ever wind you have will affect you in different ways, depending on its direction. Typically, the prevailing wind is usually in your face on the way out.

Once again, I must heap praise on all those who organise and volunteer for parkrun. I dip in and out of it as I please, but I know for a fact I can rock up at any of multiple events all over the country at 9.30 and just slip in at the start line and trot off for a 5k. And I will get an accurate 5k time sent to my phone and email later that day, with a whole host of amazing stats on my run and all the other runs if I wish. I am in the ha’penny place with parkrun compared to Gary and Niamh, who between them have clocked up well over a thousand events. And some of these have been abroad too. And they volunteer as well.

My poor tally in comparison means I am a couple of runs away from my 50 milestone. And at that point, I can purchase the top (or something similar) to prove the point.

I managed 20:32, which was good, I guess. I probably needed to use the loo, and my head was not appreciating the wine I had supped the night before. But the hamstrings held up. For some odd reason, the second k was the slowest, after a decent 3:58 first ‘lap’. And then I gradually managed to speed up thereafter. I had hoped to go a little faster, but I’ll take it. It is my fastest-ever parkrun, so there is that. And I think I finished in 8th place, and first in the age category of Old Codgers.

Sunday, and Gary and I took to the canal once more, and journeyed along the Deep Sinking and on towards Ashtown. I was wearing a pair of new shorts (as per above). They are the creation of Stephen Scullion, an Irish Olympian marathon runner whose brutal honesty has always been an inspiring and at times, tough read. More here if you are interested. That’s about as close to an endorsement as I get here, but I got the 2 in 1 pair, and they are fab. Fab because I just forgot about them. I took the phone in a pocket within the spandex lining, and a gel in the waistband. I was skeptical about the bounce that would come from carrying a phone within the shorts. No issues. Some nice details too. They will travel around Abingdon with me in October, and I plan on carrying all my gels in the band. That will be a good test.

All in, Gary and I managed just over 24k at the suggested 6k pace. And that wraps up the week nicely.

And those runs are all largely due to the Garmin Challenges set by Gary and JC, which have kept us all honest. Good plan.

The next item on the agenda is in honour of Gary from I like margarine, who left the blogosphere back in July of this year. I mean, sure, I have a sneaky admiration for the man who can bow out at the top of his game, and knows not to jump the shark. When the season finale really should be the finale, when the… (yes, we got the point! ed.). Well, all that being said, I miss Gary’s blog. It was magnificent. So I am just throwing that out into the universe. I mean, there are always Christmas specials, right? You can always get the old gang back together again for one more heist, especially when the gang is just one bloke…

One of Gary’s recurring themes were his runners. And in a recent WhatsApp group chat recently, a few parkrunners were discussing how many pairs of shoes each owned. So the other day I thought I’d root out my collection of misfits and see what the tally was. Thematically, this goes from bad to good as we move from top left to bottom right. I’ve also grouped the trail runners together in the middle row and the road shoes on the bottom.

The top left shoes are the result of a shockingly poor decision to buy a pair of knock-off Hokas having chatted to a guy wearing a pair in my local Lidl store. Seemed like a good idea at the time. It wasn’t. Cheap, yes. Hoka? No. They are actually called Hokz, and I would like to take this opportunity to apologise to the good people at Hoka for this aberration. But they fulfil the basic functions of a runner, I suppose.

Next to them are the other embarrassing moment many of us runners succumbed to having read Born to Run by Christopher McDougall. I bought a pair of Vibrams. In my defence, they were second-hand. They were fine on the dirt tracks in the woods, but otherwise, they don’t get out much. Here for full disclosure. There’s probably a support group somewhere for owners…

The Salming runners are track shoes from my late friend Ciaran. They don’t really get worn at all because they are track shoes, and probably best suited to indoors. Nor do I do any short speed events like 800 metres. Yet! Beside them are a firm favourite pair of Adidas which were the first shoes I had with essentially polystyrene cushioning. Put elastic laces on and they were perfect for triathlon. Beside them, last on the top row, are a pair of relatively cheap trail running shoes called Soil Shakers. Work fine. Strange sort of fit, but do the job.

On the second row, it’s all trail. Salomon, again from Ciaran, and another Salomon, this time ordered from the internet during Covid, as I recall. Next are the Hoka Speed Goats which got me around some fo the Wicklow Way. Beside them are yet another pair of Salomons: Speed Cross 4, and they still have the timing tag from the IMRA races I did a few years back. A great pair of shoes. Last on that row are the Saucony Peregrine 13, which are a firm trail shoe which is why they are also great for gigging, coz I can press button on my effects pedals with ease!

The bottom row are the road shoes. The first three pairs are all Saucony Endorphin Speed 3, coz I like ’em. Great fit for me, and nice cushioning. Good balance between speed and distance. Have had to resort to Vinted to get them these days. The last two are the most recent super shoes; the Adidas Adizero Adios Pro 4 with carbon rods. The last pair still have the tag on, as they have yet to hit the road. I am saving them for the marathon in Oxford, though I will of course get them out for a few spins beforehand. Other runners that have been ‘retired’ to the rank of work/painting footwear don’t count.

And that’s it really. Finally, a running blog with running stuff in it. Quelle horreur!